definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
