But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
