You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
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His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
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Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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