Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Still dying that you shit outside
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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