i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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