is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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