I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
