How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
