Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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