i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
