...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
two words...techno handjob
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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