then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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