I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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