Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
