we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
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