we're blogging at a bar
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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