break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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