brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
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