you guys were way drunker than both of me
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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