Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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