it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
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