i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize