You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I am available for nakedness
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
PANTIES FOUND
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