and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
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