why didn't you poke me back
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
