Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
