And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
