Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
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