hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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