WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
It's shark week go big or go home
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
