So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pole danced in your parka.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize