So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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