She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
