pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Go christen that room with your naked body.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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