Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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