Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize