I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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