I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Alive.
So much puke
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
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