She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
