i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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