Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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