i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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