Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Too much gin, very little bucket
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize