i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
well, you know. whores of a feather.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
