i permit you to call me
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I lost the right to judge tonight
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
