A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize