Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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