Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
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