I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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