1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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